Fatty McFatty

My professor (Dr. Burt) called me fat yesterday.

We were talking about false advertising and how food companies say their products are nutritional even if they aren't, so then I brought up the fact that HCG Drops are the same way.

They tell you to go on a 500 calorie diet and use the drops to lose weight.

But in reality, if anyone goes on a 500 calorie diet they will lose weight--with or without the drops.

Dr. Burt said, "well obviously they didn't fool you into using them."

Everyone died laughing and I'm pretty sure my face was as red as a tomato.

He was so embarrassed.  He apologized profusely and said he was meaning their marketing didn't work on me. ha ha. 

So of course everyone was peaking around my chair trying to see if I was really fat.

Good thing I'm not ;) 

Seriously though, Dr. Burt is amazing.

He has so many awards and recognitions; he has really made a name for himself.   

Check out his website

I'm really going to enjoy his class--maybe he'll teach me to be a marketing guru like him.

Until next time,

The Intelligent Blonde

Not-So-Intelligent Blonde Moments...

Can I get a show called "Lana Says the Darndest Things?"  

It would for sure be a hit.

Last night, while telling a story about New York, I started my sentence off with

"When I went to the New York City Public Library in New York..."

Thank you, captain obvious...

I would also like to dedicate one of these awards to one of the Guards at Remington Park.

Apparently if you're underage you get an arm band--since I'm clearly older than 21 I didn't have one.

When we went through the casino part the Guard looked at Chantz (who did have an arm band) and let him through.  He then proceeded to card me.  

While looking at my ID he says "Oh, you just turned 21 a few weeks ago--Congrats!"

I gave him the most retarded look and he finally figured out that the year was not 2010 and I had actually been legal for over a year now.  

Here's your sign.

As if the red box on my ID that says "Under 21 until July 29, 2010" wasn't enough...

Also, why do they give an arm band to people who aren't of legal age?  

Wouldn't it make more sense to give a band to people who are over 21?

The underage people could just cut theirs off...

Until next time, 

The Intelligent Blonde

Awkward & Awesome Thursday, Edition 21

Awkward:

People who think they're good at being sarcastic but they're really not so I just give them blank glares. 

Typos on t-shirts.

I just saw one online from Old Navy that read

"Lets Go Team"

Whoever their proofreader is, obviously didn't learn about apostrophes. 

When I saw this shirt online, it linked me to another typo shirt from Wet Seal that read

"If Your Single, So Am I"

At least they knew where to put a comma--right?

When waiters assume you're a lesbian because you're out with another girl. 

They inevitably ask if it will be on the same ticket.

The high class people I saw at the Watermelon Festival last week.
I'm sure the people at the County Fair will be just as awkward though...

Sitting behind a couple at a restaurant who is on their first date.
Better yet, a couple who just met right before their first date.
However, the most awkward is sitting behind a couple who just met right before their fist date after having met on an Internet dating site!
You better believe I eavesdropped on their conversation!
I don't know that she was too impressed--he was shorter than her, dressed down, had a shiny bald head, and ordered a plate for them to share...

Awesome:

Being an official MBA Student--even if people keep telling me I'm wasting time and money...

Waking up early every morning to go work out--it really works wonder for your mood (and looks).

This article (click on the word to go to there)

Until next time,

The Intelligent Blonde

GTL

Just to clarify, I hate Jersey Shore but it was the best title I could think of for this post.  

I joined a gym today.

Anytime Fitness, to be exact.

So far, I'm impressed!  

It's an immaculate gym with great equipment!

My only complaint is that there aren't tanning beds in the Chickasha facility.  

However, there is a fat jiggling machine there. 

It makes you feel awkward because every part of your body is shaking--pieces of fat that you didn't know were there. 

But, it felt AMAZING.  

Until next time, 

The Intelligent Blonde

Dear Readers,

Please meet my new favorite website

Sincerely,
Queen of Wasted Time 

Awkward & Awesome Thursday, Edition 20

Awkward:

Seeing this while eating my dinner:

Okay, more like sickening than awkward.  

The front view was even better!

Having her FIANCE (I only know this because they kept shouting it) saying "nature is calling" and proceed to leave her sitting at a table for like 20 minutes while he was in the bathroom.  

Wearing shorts with my white legs.

I refuse to do it.

I need a tan. BADLY.

Awesome:

Buying new diamonds for myself

Makes my heart happy :)

Deciding that I need to buy new shoes because I need a box in order to pack my new knives away.

Catching Lisa Lee's man cheating on her red-handed.

*The fact that he was cheating wasn't awesome, but the fact that we caught him sure was!

Until next time, 

The Intelligent Blonde

Heels Make Your Life Perfect

...well maybe not quite that far, 

but according to Kate (Kate + 8), they make you a better mom!* 

I'm not a Kate hater, by any means--if fact, I used to be one of her biggest fans (okay, that's a slight exaggeration, but you get the picture)--but some of the things she says/does really make me shake my head.  

I don't need an excuse to incorporate heels into my wardrobe, but I'll take it!

*Yes, that was an actual quote from Kate on one of her recent episodes.  

Until next time, 

The Intelligent Blonde

Awkward & Awesome Thursday, Edition 19

Awkward:

Receiving a text that said "I love my gf so much I think I will be proposing soon," from a number I didn't know. 

I responded with "Who is this?"

Turns out it was a guy who used to like me a long time ago--guess he wanted my permission to get married?  

News flash: if I don't know your phone number, I can assure you, I won't be heartbroken if you were to marry someone else.


Seeing that the guy you were talking to three weeks ago is now facebook officially dating some other girl. 
Umm...okay?
Your wondering eye is the EXACT reason I stopped talking to you three weeks ago!


The AT&T ad rep who keeps calling me.
You'd think my short responses and snide attitude would have given him the hint.
But alas, no such luck.
I eventually just hung up on him (for the second time, I might add).

Awesome:

Our VIP couch seating at the Rooftop viewing of Sex & the City--everyone else (sitting on backless benches) was wondering how in the world we scored the couch.  

New York Pizza.

There is just nothing in Oklahoma that compares.  

It's a fact.


Getting offered Redhaws box seats in exchange for me making an appearance at a party.
I'm well on way to my goal of having everyone know my name :)

Until next time, 

The Intelligent Blonde

Morning Sickness

Grad school is a lot like Morning Sickness--we'll call it Semester Sickness...

Grad school makes me queasy.  

Scratch that, the thought of more homework makes me nauseous.

Even worse, the bill I just got for Grad school makes me want to vomit.  

Why, oh why, do I have to be such an education snob?

Until next time, 

The Intelligent Blonde

Story of my life...

Until next time, 

The Intelligent Blonde

The City That Never Sleeps...

I haven't blogged in a long time, with good reason though--I've been in New York!

For lack of something better to say, I thought I'd share with you some pictures from my trip...

View from our hotel (27th floor):

Tour of Central Park:

Friends fountain! We were going to get in it and splash each other like they do in the show, but it was a nasty shade of green, so we passed...

We got Late Show tickets!!

I snapped pictures of the set (I broke the rules..such a rebel)

Serendipity Frozen Hot Chocolate!

Rooftop viewing of Sex & the City:

ALMOST bought this for Naner:

TSA rules are a little farfetched but understandable, I guess...

The End (Get it ;))

Until next time, 

The Intelligent Blonde