Saturday, March 3, 2012

A letter to my younger self

Wouldn't it have been so nice to have had a letter 
"guiding" us during our younger years?

I've decided to do a "letter" link-up, so after you read mine, go write your own and link it up  (if you've written one in the past, you are more than welcome to link it).

Here's what my letter would say:

You meet one of your best friends in Headstart.  Kelly is the absolute opposite of you, but that will make ya'll grow even closer.

Right after 9/11, you will almost be arrested in an airport for saying the "b-word." Lesson learned: don't say bomb around Airport Security. You didn't know better--you were just mad because they made you take off your shoes. It proves to be a funny story, later.

Your dad will get girlfriends on the internet when you're around 13. This is about the time when he stops being a "dad" and becomes a mere, sperm donor.

Your parents will open their home to foster kids when you're a teenager, and over the span of a few years, you will have more than a dozen babies come through your life. These babies will touch your life forever.

Your oldest brother's fiance will be killed by a drunk driver before you're old enough to drive. This will be your first experience with drinking and driving, but not your last.

Your parents will split when you're 15.  It will be the worst thing (because of things that are said) and the best thing (because you'll get rid of destructive people in your life) that's ever happened to you.

You will get your first kiss when you're 15. You will think it's the most awkward thing ever and giggle like a little school girl.

You will meet your other best friend when you're 16. Oddly enough, you have known her your whole life but ya'll will become close when you start working together. Lisa is exactly like you and the two of you will become inseparable. 

You will not fit in during High School. You will have friends, but you will never be one of the "popular" kids, because you don't drink or sleep around.

You will date many, many boys, but will fall hard for an awkwardly clueless boy from another school. You will have a crush on him from the first time you meet him. You will creepishly find his phone number in a phone book (back when people still used home phones) and you will call him. Ya'll will call each other every week for a year, talking about everything from your love life to life goals. You will eventually start dating and become quite smitten (he'll be your first love).  For the next year you guys will go through a lot, but in the end, the two of you will be forced to end your relationship and, unfortunately, your friendship, and move on.

You will go to six proms throughout high school!

You will go to the college you always dreamed of. You have your first dorm-life experience and absolutely love it. When they say your best friends are made in college, it's so true. While you still remain best friends with Kelly and Lisa, you add to that list Cassie and Erin.

You will do some very unexpected things, like jumping out of an airplane and getting a tattoo.

Your best guy friend, Justin, makes the mistake of drinking and driving and gets into an accident. This accident has a very big impact on your small hometown and everyone has to live with the consequences. You will make one of the hardest decisions of your life when you decide to stand by his side and support him, even though you're so against drinking and driving. Speaking of the accident, remember to give Bryson a hug and tell him you love him when you see him on New Year's Eve...that's the last time you'll ever see him.  While Justin is in prison, you will write him more times that you can count and you will even send him money to buy a television because his girlfriend will be too busy whoring around to do it herself.  Instead of being appreciated, you will be stabbed in the back; however, in the end, it will all work itself out.

You go on to date MANY guys throughout college--mainly losers. You have some very unhealthy relationships, which make you realize exactly what you want don't want.

You will rush club, with Cassie, your Sophomore year of college.

After some drama involving alcoholism and suicide attempts, Erin and Cassie will both leave college before Spring Semester, and you will be left to make new friends.

You will end up transferring back to USAO, before Junior year, and will change your major for the third time.

You will date an older guy who teaches you a lot:
1. ALWAYS trust your friends when they tell you a guy is a worthless cheater.
2.  People cannot change unless they sincerely want to, no matter how hard you might try to help them.
3.  Some people can look you in the eyes and blatantly lie to your face.
4.  If a guy is that old and still single, there's probably something wrong with him...

You will open your own foster home when you turn 21. You will have your heart broken worse than any guy could ever break it when your first foster baby leaves your home.

You will graduate college and start a big-girl job and your MBA.

Ultimately, know that you will be hurt many, many times--mostly by the people you are closest to; you will be taken advantage of and you will be treated worse than you deserve. Remember to keep your head up and not to let people get you down.

Life is what you make it. Learn to roll with the punches, laugh when you wanna cry, do crazy things you think you'll regret, and most importantly, take care of the ones you love.

P.S. When people tell you that you need to figure out your life plans while you're young--don't listen to them.  When you're 22, you still have no idea what you want to be when you're a grownup and that's okay. You have the rest of your life to figure it out.

Now go write your post and link-up!

Until next time,
The Intelligent Blonde


  1. Wow. You have been through so much, Alana (which, yeah I don't know why I told you that because obviously you're you and you knew it).
    What's great though, is that you know that all of that has made you who you are today and have decided to look at it in a positive way.
    I'm totally gonna go write one of these puppies.

  2. thanks so much for sharing! got me thinking about my 16yr old self...

  3. I love this post so much!

    It's definitely something I need to do.

  4. thanks for sharing all the things you would say to your younger self. this is something i definitely want to try some time but i think the hardest part is remembering that person who feels so once upon a time :)

  5. Wow! Scary to think of all the things we've gone through isn't it?! Seriously love the fact that you're a foster mom though! I've always wanted to be one. Just afraid it would hurt my heart to bad with the kiddos leave.


  6. I love this idea!! I love how you were able to write it out so clearly too! If I were to do this I bet it would be a few chapters of scattered thoughts rather then a letter to my younger self.

  7. Wow.. you've been through a lot. I love reflecting back on life and to see how far we have come, and how it has made us the person, we are today.

  8. Loveeee it! So sweet and sincere!


  9. I learned so much about you! I want to know more!! I want to hear more about your journey and decisions to do foster care. And I can't believe all the events that have shaped your path. You are a strong woman!

  10. I really enjoyed reading this! I also dated someone much older than me and thought, "Okay, he's never been married, never even proposed to anyone, there must be something wrong with him." :)

  11. I really like this post. If I hadn't already posted I would definitely link up! Wouldn't it have been nice to have these letters to read when we were younger? It definitely would've saved me from a lot of heartache.

  12. i love the letter to your younger self. it sounds like you have been through a lot girl! it really would be nice to have had this wisdom when we were younger, but then again think of all we have learned :) sometimes the heartache and pain makes us stronger in the end!

  13. Wow...what a life you've led already. Thank you for sharing this and being so honest.


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